Thursday, March 27, 2008

Only food

Went for a team treat last night to a good 4 star hotel on Mount Road in Chennai near DMS bus stop.

Ok, chuck confidentiality. It was Courtyard Marriott.

I have been to star hotels before. But this was an out of the world experience. Simply cos the menu sucked!! If you are a veggie, please avoid Courtyard Marriott like the plague.

Out of the total 30 - 35 dishes, hardly 6 or 7 were veg. The rest were all living-turned-non-living things. (Technically plants are living things too. But we veggies will never ever buy that argument. We would be left food-less then!)

So in all, I did not relish the food. Forget relishing, I hardly ate anything. So this post is less about all that.

What provoked me was the menu card for drinks. I reproduce a pic of that below.

Maybe when I used the word 'reproduce', I was being extremely suggestive (wink wink)

This prodded me to think how in the world people can order these drinks?

Excuse me, can you give me an orgasm please?
Excuse me, I would love to have a screaming orgasm please.
Excuse me, can I have some Slazy sex on the Beach? (this was another item that was listed below. And "slazy" was how they spelt it too)

Phew, I am sure the waiters would have a whale of time in their private rooms discussing the day's orders.

A friend of mine wondered if this was just a parliamentary way of indicating that they offer rooms per hour, a la Jab We Met.

Anyway that was that. Now on to today morning. I was coming to office by train. And a few college students were seated next to me. From their talks, I found out that they were having an exam today. One guy was saying

"Tamil Nadu manage பண்ணிரலாம் டா.. Andhra, Chettinadu தான் problem"
(Tamil Nadu can be managed. Andhra and Chettinadu would be a problem)

For a moment, I thought they were some B.Arch guys who were discussing different styles of architectures. Then when I peeped into their record note book, I realized that they were catering students, and were talking about different cuisines!

Their record note. Ah! That was a wonderful sight! Each experiment was a multiple-course menu of some cuisine. Two of the guys were "mugging" up ingredients like we used to learn apparatus required. Another was drawing lines in all pages and fretting that he should somehow convince Sir to sign in his record before the exam. Another was spreading worldly gyan:

"Machi எனக்கு no tension டா.. எந்த கேள்வி கேட்டாலும் மாவு பெசஞ்சு சப்பாத்தி செஞ்சுருவேன்.. கூட சிக்கன் கரி, சேமியா பாயசம்.. எனக்கு இவ்ளோ தான் தெரியும்.. இதுக்கு என்ன மார்க் வருமோ குடுங்க னு சொல்லிருவேன் டா"
(I have no tensions.. Whatever they ask me, I will mix some dough and make chapathis.. Then some chicken curry and Payasam.. Will declare that this is all I know, and ask them to give me marks for that)

Though it was funny then, soon I got a bit irked. Come on, cooking is something so exciting after all! And still these guys were not interested in doing it with spirit?

That was when I remembered that even I did stuff like this at college. I might say that the subjects I had to learn were of a different kind, and were not as exciting as this is. But the point is that I was the one who chose to pursue that course in my UG degree. And I should have been more sincere there.


Girl of Destiny said...

Marriot's naming convention - should I say un-convention? - seems to be out to try to prove something. But what?

Anyway... your post just goes to show that even food loses its flavor when it's made into academic course!

Karthik said...

I am not getting anything from your blog...Its so boring....Try writing some interesting topics like @#$@#$#.........

King Vishy said...

@girl of destiny:
I agree..
But the reason for that is an inherent dislike for schools and academics in us.. Maybe it all lies in the way a child is taught things in primary school.. They shd be made to realize how much fun knowledge actually is..

Machi.. You don't find Orgasm and Sex interesting eh? Humorous boy :P
Anyway, "@#$@#$" pathi naa edhavudhu sollanum na, I can utmost list the ASCII values of these symbols.. (Why blood? :))

ஸ்ரீ said...

Better turn into a non-veggie buddy :). Pass on me the hotels name dude.

King Vishy said...

I used to eat non-veg earlier.. But for some reason have become a staunch veggie now.. Dont think I will be going back :) And the name of the hotel is in the post itself: Courtyard Marriot.

Nikhil said...

What I loved was the fact that both Orgasm and Screaming Orgasm had a "*" at the end of the name. "Conditions apply"? ;-)

hantan said...

lol.. to ask those ppl in arabian costumes for an orgasm wud be gay beyond imagination..
that was a lafter riot.. fell off the chair reading it.. your hard luck seems to be our good luck..

and i wonder why every college passed out feels the same way abt their coll stuff.. that we shuda been more sincere........

King Vishy said...

LOL.. Gr8 observation..

Thanks for ur compliments.. but wishing me hard luck for ur good luck is mean! :)
And u are soon passing out na.. Next yr this time you'd feel the same..

Subha said...

he he one but it seems a bit deviated.Kind of juggling b/w two messages.Still loved it, esp the way u explained the menu;)

Sheks said...

You should have done what is specified in the menu at the top of the list--Shot em' up!

King Vishy said...

Ya, the post was on two diff things.. dint want to put up two diff posts for this..

LoL.. Will bear that in mind if I go there again..